


Cross-Eyed Zeebits

by unknowableroom_archivist



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Humor, One Shot
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2007-07-26
Updated: 2007-07-26
Packaged: 2019-01-19 14:56:56
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,013
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12412497
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/unknowableroom_archivist/pseuds/unknowableroom_archivist
Summary: What is everyone else doing on the days when Harry, Ron, Hermione, and Griphook are busying themselves with plans of breaking into Gringott's? Covering one of those days, this one-shot (at least that's what it is right now) allows the reader take a look at what happened between Dean and Luna during their stay at the cottage.





	Cross-Eyed Zeebits

**Author's Note:**

> Note from ChristyCorr, the archivist: this story was originally archived at [Unknowable Room](http://fanlore.org/wiki/Unknowable_Room), a Harry Potter archive active from 2005-2016. To preserve the archive, I began manually importing its works to the AO3 as an Open Doors-approved project after May 2017. I e-mailed all creators about the move and posted announcements, but may not have reached everyone. If you are (or know) this creator, please contact me using the e-mail address on [Unknowable Room collection profile](http://www.archiveofourown.org/collections/unknowableroom).

**Disclaimer:** I don't own any Harry Potter stuff, unfortunately. I did write this though! xD

**Author's Note:** As my cousin says, it's random. As Paris says, it's Luna Lovegood. Take your pick.  


   
Dean decided that he could be in a much worse place at the moment. It wasn’t home, it wasn’t Hogwarts, but it also wasn’t the wilderness or the Malfoy Manor. He was much happier to be in Shell Cottage, even if there were about seven other people living in the small house with him at the moment, than to be on the run in the wild or to be tortured by crazy Bellatrix Lestrange. 

Yes, it was much better here.

Shifting on the sofa, he leaned against the arm and looked into the other room where Luna was discussing (more like telling, really) the pros of having a Cross-eyed Zeebit as a household pet with Bill, who was looking at her with a mixture of horror and amazement plastered on his face.

“You know, they are quite useful pets.”

Bill nodded, his mouth open slightly and his brow furrowed.

“They go around the entire room, looking at everything separately. They have such good vision that they can see every piece of dust on anything! It’s quite wonderful,” Luna said, smiling widely. “They use their tail to brush all the dust off. You see, they are allergic to the Alpinators that live on dust, so they use their tails to brush it off and collect it.” 

“But you said that they’re allergic to the… erm, Alpi-whatsits on the dust? How can they touch it with their tails?” Bill regretted the words as soon as they left his mouth.

“Their tails are practically separated from their body’s nervous system. The hairs on the tail are coated with a special coating that de-allergitizes the Alpinators so that they can live on the Zeebit’s body! The Alpinators feed off of the earwax in the Zeebit’s ears. Their feces then create the special coating on the hair of the tails! They live on the tail except when they feed.” Luna nodded enthusiastically, looking at Bill with the most serious of faces.

“Gee,” he said quietly, scratching the back of his head, “It’s like a whole… er… ecosystem…”

Dean let out a snort, amazed at Bill’s ability to simply sit and listen to Luna go on and on about creatures that didn’t even exist. The last time that Dean and Luna had tried to have a conversation Dean had interrupted her in the middle, telling her that he urgently needed to floss his teeth.

Suddenly glancing at his right wrist, which was completely devoid of any time-keeping device, Bill muttered, “Oh, look at the time, I have to go. Goodbye Luna!” And with that he dashed out of the cottage. 

Quickly, so as to avoid Luna’s gaze, Dean sat up. He knew that if she saw him…

“Hello, Dean!” 

The young man closed his eyes and sighed. He knew that if she saw him she would rush to continue their previous conversation about Nargles, which he had no interest what-so-ever to revisit. 

“Hullo, Luna,” Dean said, glancing out the window nervously. Perhaps he could pull a Bill and dash out…

“You’re looking a bit sad… Do you think the Pessimisters have invaded your brain again?”

Dean snorted again and grinned at Luna. However, once he realized she was looking very concerned, he cleared his throat and said, “Oh, uhm, yes. I suppose you’re right.”

Luna sighed and sat down next to Dean on the couch. “I know you think I’m strange, Dean.”

Dean glanced at Luna, starting to feel a bit guilty. “I don’t think you’re strange.” He noticed his voice didn’t sound half as convincing as he’d hoped.

She gave him a broad smile. “You don’t have to lie to me. I know what people think of me. Daddy always tells me that I should be grateful for the true friends. You know, the ones who always telling you when you’re going a bit loopy. The fake ones just go on pretending that they didn’t notice.” She giggled and put her hand on Dean’s shoulder. “Thank you for letting me know that the Cliklers were taking over me.” 

As she left the room, Dean stared after her with a look of utter confusion. He was absolutely clueless as to what just happened. And it was at that very moment that he decided Luna Lovegood was most definitely the strangest person he’d ever met in his entire life.  
  


For the rest of the day, Dean tried to avoid her and was very successful until around six o’clock that night, when he went outside to sit by the coast. Sitting on a large rock, legs crossed, eyes closed, was Luna. He would’ve turned around and gone back into the cottage if she hadn’t addressed him.

“I hope the Pessimisters have left your brain to yourself, Dean.” 

“Er, yes. I… uh, I believe they have…” He took a few steps towards her and sat down next to her on the large rock. She kept her eyes closed. He noticed that a low buzz was emitting from her pursed lips. He looked up at her, eyebrow raised.

“Luna, what’re you doing?”

She opened her eye a crack. “Relaxing. It’s been a very difficult day. I’ve been trying to get the Cliklers to leave, but they just seem to be enjoying themselves so much.”

Dean nodded, pretending to know what she was talking about.

“You know, whenever you get within three feet of my aura, my heart starts beating faster?” Her eyes were closed again.

Dean’s brow furrowed and his cheeks began to flush. “W-what do you mean?”

“I think it means that you’re a friend. My mum always said that when you get excited to see someone, it means that they’re nice to you.” 

He swallowed and wrapped his arms around his knees, looking out over the ocean. “Oh, well… thanks Luna. I, er,” he paused, thinking. “I guess I get excited to see you too.”

Luna smiled. “I know.” 


End file.
